Groundhog Day

Nobody asked but …

I don’t get it.  Why this human propensity to wig out over an excruciating obsession with air currents?  The physics behind weather has long been known.  The Earth has a tilt and rotation, an orbit about a living sun.  It’s cut and dried.  The poor weatherman on TV has to come up with something to keep us buying pork’n’beans.

This year and last it was the Polar Vortex (with a spooky voice like Count Floyd’s), as if there were some new phenomenon delivered by aliens, to replace the scary Alberta Clippers from prior years.

Here in Kentucky, we talk about Groundhog Day like this:  If Punxsutawny Phil sees his shadow we expect 6 more weeks of Winter, otherwise we may see about 42 days of Winter.  In either event, the Ides of March is the beginning of the end.  We’ll be mowing grass soon.  It’s like clockwork.

In Kentucky, we also observe that everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.  We can’t, because it’s in the stars.

I’m not a climate change denier.  I am a natural law affirmer.

— Kilgore Forelle

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