Once I realized so many of the messages I recieved as a young girl and teenager didn’t serve me or make sense as an adult, I dove deep into books that rocked my world. I love books for this reason. They can offer a fresh new perspective and change the way you view and approach reality. One book can be a total paradigm shift for you. I have read several such books, and that is what I want to offer you here.
This isn’t about convincing anyone to do things my way (how boring a world that would be!). But if you don’t know that you have choices beyond the mainstream world, then you aren’t actually making decisions from a place of truth and desire. You are living on autopilot and not considering the impact of living a life in accordance to the status quo, whose only agenda is to keep you relying on it. So what do I mean by giving away power?
Children are wild and free. This alone can be very triggering to some people, but they are and that is the truth of their biology. They are meant to move, explore, be rowdy, run around, test things, play, and be in connection with other people. And not just for a couple of hours blocked off every day, but all the time. They are meant to live it. The problem is not children, the problem is a society that makes no room for them to be who they are.
“Whoever wrote this and did the research is confused and did not define terms accurately. I spanked, not hit, all nine of my children and they do not hit. Never have. My grown children are well adjusted, well behaved, loving kids. I receive positive compliments about them often. Spanking is quite misunderstood.”
“Let people parent how they want to parent” is for things like what time your kids go to bed. You cannot say that when you are being violent to children. And I will say this one more time. Hitting anyone is violent. I will defend the right of children over your assumed “right” to hurt them. If someone starves their child of food, do you protest, “let people parent how they want to parent?!”
I think attention is a wonderful commodity and the anecdote to so many of the problems that arise with our children. The key is to understand what kind of attention is helping and what kind of attention is hurting.
Consciousness around child raising is something we are seeing more and more of, and it is so refreshing to see two people go down this path, pre-pregnancy.
For an adult who wasn’t taught to identify their emotions and own them as their own, spanking or swatting is, unfortunately, the easiest way to respond to a child who has triggered us. We are literally being exactly like a child when we hit. We are in our child minds because we were not taught a better way.
And now I take your hand – I lead you to a better land – Let’s get outta here, – I say Let’s run and play – Because as I became mother – I let go of another – I let go of Me
The most empowering thing (well, one of the..) I realized as a mother is that we often times overcomplicate raising children, and we don’t have to. In fact, everyone, including your child, benefits when you don’t. Not to mention you save time, money, and frustration in the process. Here are 6 items that you can do without (mostly) because they can do more harm than good.