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How Children Really React to Control

Violent control is at the heart of modern parenting. It’s counter-productive, harmful, and unethical in my estimation. My wife and I only recently abandoned violent parenting, opting instead for loving, gentle guidance, and we’ve found nothing but confirmation every day since.

“When one person tries to control another, you can always expect some kind of reaction from the controllee. The use of power involves two people in a special kind of relationship – one wielding power, and the other reacting to it.

This seemingly obvious fact is not usually dealt with in the writings of the dare-to-discipline advocates. Invariably, they leave the child out of the formula, omitting any reference to how the youngster reacts to the control of his or her parents or teachers.” – Thomas Gordon, Ph.D., read the rest.

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Skyler J. Collins (Editor)

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Founder and editor of Everything-Voluntary.com, Skyler is a husband and unschooling father of three beautiful children. His writings include the column series “One Voluntaryist’s Perspective” and “One Improved Unit,” and blog series “Two Cents” and “Items of Note.” Skyler also wrote the books No Hitting! and Toward a Free Society, and edited the books Everything Voluntary and Unschooling Dads. You can hear Skyler chatting away on the official Everything-Voluntary.com podcast.

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